A few (maybe a lot of) things…

this is another hodge podge post with random things that are going on.  my days/weeks are seriously running together and i can barely keep track of what day it is.  sigh.  i hope this craziness slows down a bit.  instead of enjoying each day and second, mike and i are literally racing to just get stuff done.  i keep hearing that this baby stage is so short and we should really take our time soaking it up.  but where is the time??

a few things that i’ve learned about myself in the last 3 months…

1. i am a control freak.  i thought i was “chill” and “laid-back”.  umm no.  that was a a façade.  inside i’m a stress ball trying to control all the moving parts.  asking for help is super hard for me (which has resulted in 3 meltdowns so far… maybe more if you ask mike.  lol)

2. i am more obsessed with lucy than i thought.  lol  hahaha can that even be POSSIBLE you ask??  yes… yes it can.  more on that below…

3. i am MUCH more OCD than i thought.  as i visit daycares and do things around the house for charlotte i see how intense i feel about dirt, residue, germs, etc.

4. i really don’t need 9-10 hours of sleep a night.  i thought i would die if i didn’t get at least 8.  now i’m running on about 4-5 and i’m still alive.  shocker.  am i all there?  no.  do i stop midway through sentences and forget what i was talking about?  lol yes often.  but i’m alive!

5. instagram is no big deal.  gasp!  SHOCKING right?  i used to check insta like 10x a day.  now i’m lucky if i get through it once.  i was so stressed about missing stuff on my feed that i unfollowed like 60 people (out of 520).  i wanted to make sure i saw posts from my friends but who cares about the random stylist, blogger, artist, social media personality… right?!  i told mike how stressed out i was about this and he LITERALLY rolled his eyes and shook his head.  #firstworldproblems?  #mommyproblems?  puhaha

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6. my hair is falling out in huge clumps.  sigh.  it’s disgusting how much hair is everywhere but i guess i just gotta get through this time.  my hair is growing back pretty coarse which i love.  that’s how my hair used to be and the it started to change in my mid-20s to fine textured hair.  oh the joys of pregnancy…not.

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lucy.  oh lucy bear.  for the past 3 months we knew that lucy was hungry for attention/love and that we were constantly saying “bad” or “no”.  but this past week i started to see just how it was affecting her.  she was getting very protective and aggressive over things she would claim as hers in the house.  like a piece of plastic or paper that she would play with/rip up.  in the past if you tried to take it away she just let you.  but now she growls!  she protects it and gets mad.  🙁  then over the weekend she managed to get a piece of quesadilla off the table and ran away with it.  when i tried to take it away she was SUUPER pissed, growled a lot and almost bit mike!  (now even if lucy did bite mike she wouldn’t have punctured the skin~but it’s just the actual act that shocked us.)  we put her in her place with a lot of strong voices, had her sit down, lay down, and then did the whole caesar milan power play.  luckily, lucy hasn’t shown that kind of aggression since.  that incident really opened up our eyes to how we were neglecting her.  she has such a sweet, non-aggressive demeanor but the last few months of change has been too much for our little fur babe. =(

now we are taking the time to go back to her normal schedule and give her as much love as possible throughout the day/night/week.  after the baby came we took her out once a day (if she was lucky), we barely played with her and she went through a small depression.  now we take her out 3x a day so she can socialize with other dogs, get her energy out, and go back to the normal routine we used to have with her.  then when i’m home i try my best to give her love and make sure she’s happy too.  LOL

this sounds SO cray right?? i found out this weekend just how much i loved lucy.  i know a lot of dog owners who have given their dogs away after having a baby.  or at the very least wanted to give their dog away.  for me this entire situation showed me that i need to love, cuddle and spoil lucy even MORE.  puhahaha is that even possible??  it hurt my heart to see her personality change b/c of a lack of love.  she should always feel safe and happy in our home right?  i mean…she is my first baby afterall. =P

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i bought these on a whim at bed, bath and beyond a few weeks ago and they are DERRRRICIOUS.  i only let myself have a few tiiiny pieces but i want to dump them in my mouth straight from the bag.  LOL  that’s how good they are.

what’s so strange is that before the baby i didn’t like chocolate.  but about 1 month before charlotte was born until now…i’m obsessed with it.  weird right?  hopefully it’ll go away soon.  i hate feeling so addicted to it.

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this is seriously a meal for one.  LOL  mike was in columbia all last week and the thought of cooking for one was annoying.  the first few meals he was gone i ate cereal, heated up random tv dinners and ate sandwiches.  but after a while you want a delicious hot meal.  so this above was a “family deal” that i ate over two days.  i should have thought of this sooner!!  next time mike is out of town (which is often) i’m just ordering one big family meal to last while he’s gone.  not having to think about what to eat is such a time/life saver.  plus cooking for 1 is sad and not worth my time these days.

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yummy looking right?!  i went to a new place called “the little easy” in downtown LA.  cajun food.  SOO yummy.  this was off their brunch menu above but i heard the dinner food is BOMB.  my friend and i went out to lunch after church (sans baby) and i had unlimited mimosas with this meal.  it felt so good to do something from my old life.  lol.  just throw back a few cocktails, talk about nonsense and pig out on delicious hearty food.  <3  mama needs these pockets of time to feel sane!

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just a few pics of C. =)  we’re going to hawaii this december for christmas and new years.  i’m SOOOOO beyond excited.  it’ll be C’s first plane ride and i’ll get to spend time with my family.  before C, living in separate states was no biggie.  but now that she’s here, i REALLY REALLY miss my parents and my brother.  i want to spend every holiday with them and see them as much as possible.  it hurts my heart to think that C could grow up without knowing them or seeing them much.  *sad face *

sooo i’m determined to go to hawaii 2x per year or have my parents come to me at least 1x per year.  if not more…i’m plotting to have my parents move back soon if possible.  heh heh heh.*rubbing hands together *  luckily my brother is going to be in LA 2 weekends a month for the next 2 years.  i feel REALLLY REALLY lucky to have this time with him.  little lottie needs her samchoon to spoil her and love her to pieces.

below we took pics of c in a hawaiian outfit my mom bought her with hawaiian music in the background.  hehe we sent the video to my parents since we’re coming to see them in a few months!
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c is changing and growing soooo much.  can’t believe how different she looks already.  sometimes she looks really asian and other times she looks more white.  crazy huh?  i’m guessing she will go back and forth the rest of her life.  she is the spitting image of mike.  i hope she has is gentle personality as well.  b/c i was NOT sweet or gentle growing up.  eek.

c is SUPER observant, alert and curious.  she loves to sit up and see things.  if you lay her down or hold her with the wall behind you she flips out.  it’s exciting to see her stare at objects and figure things out.  she can reach out now and looks at lucy all the time.  i can’t wait till she can pet her and they can interact together.  charlotte hits and kicks lucy all the time (by accident of course) and i love how lucy lets it happen.  she tries to get in a few licks when i’m not looking but it’s sweet to see them together.  can’t wait for more #lucyandlottie moments to happen!

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